While running the other night, I passed by a young boy who was riding a big wheel on the sidewalk. He must have been only four years old or so, and he had a truly puzzled look on his face. He asked me, “whatchoo running for?” He said this in all seriousness. His question took me off-guard, as I was expecting more of a comment or jeer instead of pure curiosity.
I wanted to give him an answer as I passed, so I quickly said “to stay in shape!” He replied, “What???” and I had to look over my shoulder behind me and yell my answer this time, “TO STAY IN SHAPE!”
He looked confused as I kept running. I wonder what he was thinking and if it meant anything to him.
This is a single sentence suggested for addition to a contract. Yes, a single sentence. This, my friends, is Legalese:
Notwithstanding the immediately preceding sentence, if the named parties in such action (including impleaded parties) include the indemnified and the indemnifying parties, and the indemnified party shall have been advised by counsel that there may be a conflict between the positions of the indemnifying party and the indemnified party in conducting the defense of such action or that there are legal defenses available to such indemnified party different from or in addition to those available to the indemnifying party, then counsel for the indemnified party shall be entitled, if the indemnified party so elects, to conduct the defense to the extent reasonably determined by such counsel to be necessary to protect the interests of the indemnified party, at the expense of the indemnifying party, if it is determined by a court of competent jurisdiction that under the terms of this SOW the indemnified party is entitled to indemnification hereunder.
Note: I originally posted what I thought was a single sentence with 255 words. It was actually two sentences, and I missed the punctuation (a period) that was buried in the mess. I have edited this post to include the first sentence, along with readability results from Edit Central. Thanks go to Angela Colter for the link to that service.
- Flesch reading ease score: -85.1
- Automated readability index: 78.2
- Flesch-Kincaid grade level: 62.2
- Coleman-Liau index: 15.4
- Gunning fog index: 67.1
- SMOG index: 32
- 953 characters
- 805 non-space characters
- 795 letters/numbers
- 149 words
- 28 complex words
- 248 syllables
- 1 sentence
- 5.34 chars per word
- 1.66 syllables per word
- 149 words per sentence
This bird was given to me by Kevin Sharon. Thanks for giving me the bird!